Missy Elliott...
https://youtu.be/iBHNgV6_znU
As a young and brooding intellectual, I was singularly unimpressed with TS Elliott's poetry in my junior year of high school, turning 17 or actually 17. Even now, looking back he seems utterly inconsequential. By comparison, the Canadian rock group, the Crash Test Dummies, who actually used one of TS Elliott's famous poem lines about measuring afternoons with coffee spoons, actually seemed to have a lot more exciting things to say in their lyrics. And their music was so often impressive and original.
I walked away from TS Elliott thinking he was an utter non entity. Even the dog from Seth MacFarlane's Family Guy, who fashions himself as an aspiring LA writer or the like, seems far more capable than TS Elliott.
In fact, I cannot take TS Elliott seriously at all. Like John McEnroe, fuming with anger, smashing his tumblers and toasters and crystal goblets and whatever you can call a drinking vessel or jar made from glass, 'he (TS ELLIOTT) cannot be serious!'
He cannot be serious!!!!
https://youtu.be/t0hK1wyrrAU
Everyone saw his poetry was inconsequential! Everyone except my year 11 English teacher, Mr Starling. Also my Legal Studies teacher and like my teacher for one other thing, it seemed 17 and me and Mr Starling were a whole thing. My classmate Wendy or whatever her name was would come by with her giggling laughs, like a six year old, and start playing with my hair. How could a seventeen year old girl act like a six year old so unashamedly? I could not understand if she ever felt any passion for me or just childish affection.
At our table under Mr Starling's own youthful gaze, he couldn't have been older than 22 or 24 himself, just a kid, apart from Wendy and I and the carrot-colored-hair television stat (or star, whatever) muchacho from the tv adventure island Saturday morning tv show whatever it was. There was Bernadette. An extremely sexy looking Asian girl with her unforgettable tight shirts and tight skirts, always a pleasure to roll my gaze over every curve and bang of her hair. Her dark eyes smoldered like a South East Asian jungle spewing smoke or fog or something. Long jet black straight hair, well cared for. Short, like barely five feet tall. Who could remember who the other dummies were?
Afternoons and coiffure spoons... Crash Test Dimmies...
https://youtu.be/W0YeGv5xHUU
Catherine, that's right. Her and Bernadette became lawyers in the end. Catherine was very sensible in an English kind of way, she looking to be quite English like Wendy, but also like Wendy, not a looker, not real sexy. Unlike Wendy she was not given to unusual displays of affection involving ambushing me and rubbing my coiffure. Giggling hysterically, childlike.
Another blonde, white girl, this one very hot, not in my classes, borrowed a VHS video tape from me and never returned it. Maybe that was her way of flirting. I think Laura the south American girl in Spanish class definitely liked me. She called me a rebel one day in class. Then Alejandro the Uruguayan muchacho heard that and thought it was so funny. Five years later I would run into him again with my Jew girl college girlfriend in the long pedestrian tunnel running out of Central station.
My mother did always say, emphatically, 'be care-eff-full (three syllables) when you get on the train!!!!'.... maybe she was worried about the crash test dummies. I wonder why Mrs Wolowitz never warned her son about being care-eff-full when he had to get on the train....
https://youtu.be/7EBN0xlUGOg
I guess the takeaway is Wendy, Bernadette, Catherine, the hot looking blonde girl with my VHS tape, Laura the south American, even our Spanish teacher from Kentucky, and my Jew girl girlfriend from five years later all probably would have loved it if I had called them señorita, but probably not Mr Starling. No point second guessing the past, but in hindsight, it would have been better only to have tapped Bernadette, the hot blonde with the VHS and possibly Laura, and definitely not the Jew girl.
Would you love it if someone called you señorita, zer/zie?
https://youtu.be/YOJ3wd0Kl2E
No comments:
Post a Comment