It's sure been a while.
So can you imagine if I only had Spanish nationality but no other nationality and Millie and Austin were my dads and they adopted me to leave wherever and live with them on their little farm in Utah or Colorado, maybe near the border. Should there be a laugh track?
Maybe some funny between segments music like in sitcoms. Scene 23, Ben walks into the kitchen, instead of John Goodman and Roseanne, Millie and Austin are at the kitchen table.
Ben: hi dads
(Canned laughter, ditzy interlude music ends)
Hey Ben, how was free community college? When are you gonna join the army?
(More canned laughter)
Ben: yeah you think the army is going to take a crazy bastard like me? Don't you know they have psychological screenings?
(Canned laughter)
Come on Ben, the army will make a man out of you, they'll just yell every last vestige of individuality out of you. Then you can become a surgeon, go to medical school.
Ben: (sits down makes milk shake with ice cream and whipped cream etc) medical school takes five years, I could probably start twenty global wars in less time
(Canned laughter)
Five years is a long time, but you'd have a skill set for life.
Ben: what about you guys? What's going on at work, didn't you say you're ending some crazy war or something?
Flick, channel gets changed on the remote controller....
https://youtu.be/kemivUKb4f4
Flick....
Prince Harry in Afghanistan....
https://youtu.be/X3z9pnTWcLY
Lot of machinery getting left to the Taliban. They'll consider that a jizyat or whatever it's called in Arabic, a mandatory tax unbelievers must pay believers. They'll fight over it and it will enrich their hierarchy considerably. They'll go on being a narco state. There's just no fight in the street afghanis at all. I mean the Taliban are really a warrior caste, 'fighters' as Trump says. There's no fight in local afghanis to shoot a bunch of these guys at all. Wow.
Commercial break's over, lead in music to sit com 'Ben and his padres' plays....
https://youtu.be/BHcYFxU4fMo
Austin: you gonna share any of that smoothie Ben?
Ben: probably not
(Canned laughter / knock on the door)
Millie: come in!!!!!
(Enter Britney Spears dressed Australian like with one of those dangling wine cork hats)
Rita: g'day mates!
(Studio audience goes crazy)
Austin: Ben your father and I have adopted another child, this is your new sister Rita from down under
(More studio audience madness)
Ben: get out of town! Hello new incestuous love interest, I'm your big brother (hugs, squeezes ass)
Millie: Rita's a dancer, she made a big splash down under now she's going to try to make it in Utah
Ben: is that right? Someone to compete with little old me?
Rita: you can dance?
Ben: did you hear that black dad? Did you hear that?
Austin: good lord Millie I knew this was going to be a problem
Rita: what's the problem?
Ben: girl the problem they is black people all over these United states think they can dance better than me
Austin: Lord save us
Millie: don't take the Lord's name in vain Austin buddy
Ben: well it's true girl, they is a MILLION folks end up in hospital on medications for mental health reasons on account they thought they could dance better than me girl. Most especially the black folks. Ain't that right daddy Austin?
Austin: have mercy
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