Dear Iran Mullahs,
We have something we want you to mull over that doesn't travel at mach 3. We want to send you a very special envoy..... You guys are going to get along great 👍 We understand your friends in Yemen are not exactly over the moon with oil revenues in their neighbourhood. Some people say our envoy OJ shares your 'death to America' views, especially after his wife turned up dead. You like the gulf of Hormuz. He loves golf. You're desperately running out of drinking water, our guy has the juice (orange juice, lots of it), but not the Jews, we know you don't like them. We know he looks like a happy version of the dad in that classic TV show Good Times, but it's a different guy. You saw we did for Afghanistan, especially with the Biden happy ending. Our military cadre has been kind of umming and ahhing about switching over to drone technologies from big missiles. Our envoy likes to drink a lot (of booze) we hope you won't torture him for this but if you do we'll understand and do nothing about it. You like football, he likes football. Do you ever feel like you stole your country from Alexander the Greek? Well ask OJ about leftist degenerates and welcome to country ceremonies about stolen land and sovereignty never ceded.
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