Creating next episode of Shirley, Drewcifer and Fergie legal meeting, possible ideas

 

Bring in Ricky Gervais somehow. 

Interesting facts, Gervais is 15 years older than his Benjiness. At age 15 Ronald the aboriginal guy in Western Sydney was rumored to have a number of children, offspring, from various teenagers already.

Reasonable conclusion, if Gervais and his Benjiness were both Aborigines from Western Sydney we could be father and son.

Ricky Gervais - Wikipedia https://share.google/r6d2mogmSuwmflxCD

Try a TV license gag in connection with liasing with special crown prosecutor's office.... 

What a blessing never to have watched any of Gervais' TV shows. Maybe even feeling suicidally depressed was better. Seems redundant although Gervais can be funny doing stand up.

Rolf Harris, Drewcifer's mom connection....

Don't forget the egg head junior  doing his calculations.... Thus....

https://youtu.be/YSPaLiTBL3E?si=uMf33ZkjKzjQN1rS

Gervais likes men

We can be heroes: Shirley, Andrew (Drewcifer) and Fergie hold a legal meeting

 

We can be heroes....

https://youtu.be/lXgkuM2NhYI?si=BXKo3wISCjF0nuRk

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Got milk?

https://youtu.be/KhJ1ABovYxU?si=rA3NTWNWSjX4s2Y_

Fergie's depositions potentially raise question marks?

https://youtu.be/WpYeekQkAdc?si=QeiR1F1pzvryE6il

Maxwell in Montreal with her brother???

https://youtube.com/shorts/Ipcr5m2chZE?si=kBU2tvehW0UO24Yb

Charlie and Erika Kirk; Brittany Higgins, Bruce Lehman

 Pearl jam...

https://youtu.be/MS91knuzoOA?si=q4kKiURMczk5ThX0

A lot of talk about Erika on the Internet, rich family, Epstein connections, tight with prominent Israeli politicians..... Relationship with Charlie 

https://youtu.be/6eWzH5-tXuc?si=GXJqYgAJZPHSBlZh

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Candace doesn't like Ben Shapiro, in case you care....

https://youtube.com/shorts/51vzFy3B0hg?si=SVTorcHIopvJbL8d

Epstein's top four women apart from Maxwell...

https://youtu.be/wCQ0BZquSZs?si=emP3b9v78GgUvOXl

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Shirley and Maverick, Andrew and Fergie.....

 

https://youtu.be/qSqVVswa420?si=fWUSzN9Ct7_jv_Nb

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Inch by inch.,..

https://youtu.be/LrkEc2V3mO4?si=XnNH3aDNfPT_hzWD

Former DOJ LAWYER criticizes Bondi DOJ

 

Lawyer Oyer

https://youtube.com/shorts/9200it2zr9s?si=3Aez2YmtU-cw4WxT

Practicing Dimitur D riffs morning after big show

 

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Dimitur D channels his inner Pam Bondi....

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Epstein saga, Bondi grilled by Californian lawmaker .... Dimitur D debrief

 

Congressional hearing:

https://youtube.com/shorts/6fkJ_2WrZUQ?si=ux5utZWgi8U-gnxZ

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Post Dimitur D debrief.....

Coming out as lesbian and Australian Aboriginal to avoid enlistment in Russian army and make money post relocation from Moscow respectively.

Notable lesbian, Miley Cyrus, also MC responded she was proud to be a lesbian after prompting from Dimitur D.

Ad libbing: everything.

Crowd work, increasing 

Miley Cyrus: lesbian 

https://youtu.be/vA2Lc9c3qN0?si=EVdIqvgGWfbbnMzp

Inspiration: Jimmy Macelroy, ice skater...

https://youtu.be/V_KtCZ5bQEI?si=AE6zmnc7GpFihBGP

Russian accent, solid

Shortcoming, inability to step and hold mike. Stuck at microphone stand.

Plus side: no nerves

Dear Jeffrey Epstein, bla bla bla 'as long as you bring your harem' Richard Branson

 

See why I don't admire or need or want a 'knighthood'?

Can you imagine me emailing Australian Prime Minister John Howard if we were chummy and saying hey John I'd love to catch up again as long as you bring your harem?

I mean I especially wouldn't want a harem John's age, or actually, would I?

Anyway that's how your knight talks to his now apparently deceased homeboy JE, check it out:

Australian right of center liberal party reboots with a new leader...

 

System freezing up bruz? Just reboot....

NDIS: overblown, fraudulent, scam

ABC Channel: over funded, too leftist 

Cure acne and car sickness....

https://youtu.be/ig446isvXlI?si=aZ7V6g1hn-6w5MNw

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Agriculture big in Spain cuz.... you can fruit too 

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Are the National Liberal Party draped up and dripped out? Can they save Victoria from the labor party?

https://youtu.be/5aKjQ_0ci0g?si=xTK5ZelxGNQUgZH6

FBI Epstein investigation, what about the jet?

 

Seal, Crazy.....

https://youtu.be/4Fc67yQsPqQ?si=QpMtUdhm0JQWBsEl

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Department of Benji declassification of file on Pam Bondi, albeit with tachaduras.....

Pam looks ####### fine and appears to have an #### and #### to die for. Want a good time? Get a pair of handcuffs, a whip, your 1001 nights fancy dress gear and call ###. Don't forget the ####.

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Roseanne Barr on billionaire cannibal types...

https://youtube.com/shorts/EljzoIqKbTs?si=XoPZRF3o7fjyWh7h

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... Benji explains his philosophical underpinnings for insisting on Lolita Express depositions....

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Shirley, Pam and Cash: special Congressional hearing deposes Shirley

 Theme music.... 🎶 🎵 

https://youtu.be/dEjXPY9jOx8?si=3Mt0o65tCz5Wxyrk

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Moments later....

https://youtube.com/shorts/pF7BupG5QYM?si=tjwOWtEAxYlChKWR

In Mandarin Chinese, unlike European languages, articles preceding items or things or 'stuff' are coordinated with the shape or function of the thing. For example 'a' bottle is one (or two or thousands) 'of' bottles in English, but in Chinese, it's 'ping' for bottle but 'zhang' for something flat like an image or photo. 

https://youtu.be/lYHA_7vxrgc?si=XrcXetivKnxOK1rV

Chinese language and alphabet has tremendous scope for sophistication.

Hànzì Pīnyīn Used for: Example Translation

个 gè people or objects 一个人 (yī gè rén) a person

块 kuài pieces of cloth, cake, soap, etc.; money and currency units (colloquial) 一块蛋糕 (yī kuài dàngāo) a piece of cake

只 zhī birds and certain animals, one of a pair, some utensils, boats, etc. 一只鸟 (yī zhī niǎo) a bird

本 běn books, parts of a serial, etc. 一本书 (yī běn shū) a book

辆 liàng vehicles 一辆车 (yī liàng chē) a car

瓶 píng quantity contained in a bottle, vase, jar or flask 一瓶啤酒 (yī píng píjiǔ) a bottle of beer

杯 bēi certain containers of liquids: glass, cup 一杯水 (yī bēi shuǐ) a glass of water

双 shuāng pairs (of shoes, socks, chopsticks, etc.) 一双袜子 (yī shuāng wàzi) a pair of socks

件 jiàn clothes, events, things, etc. 一件衣服 (yī jiàn yīfú) a piece of clothing

张 zhāng flat objects and sheets (bed, desk, paper, etc.); certain body parts (face, mouth) 一张纸 (yī zhāng zhǐ) a piece of paper

碗 wǎn measurement of food and drink (bowl) 一碗饭 (yī wǎn fàn) a bowl of rice

种 zhǒng types, kinds, sorts 一种动物 (yī zhǒng dòngwù) a type of animal

匹 pǐ horses, mules; bolts of cloth 一匹马 (yī pǐ mǎ) a horse

头 tóu certain domestic animals (cattles, mules, pigs, etc.); garlic 一头猪 (yī tóu zhū) a pig

条 tiáo long, narrow or thin objects (ribbon, river, road, trousers, etc.) 一条鱼 (yī tiáo yú) a fish

位 wèi people (courteous) 一位女士 (yī wèi nǚshì) a lady

项 xiàng itemized things (clauses, tasks, research projects, etc.) 一项项目 (yī xiàng xiàngmù) a project

名 míng people 一名学生 (yī míng xuéshēng) a student

些 xiē a small amount or small number (greater than one) 一些东西 (yī xiē dōngxī) some things

家 jiā families or business establishments 一家公司 (yī jiā gōngsī) a company

点(儿) diǎn('er) a little; a bit; some 一点(儿)纸 (yī diǎn(er)zhǐ) some paper

场 cháng recreational, sports or other activities 一场球赛 (yī chǎng qiúsài) a ball game; a match

句 jù sentences 一句话 (yī jù huà) a sentence

段 duàn stories, periods of time, lengths of thread, etc. (a section, segment or part) 一段时间 (yī duàn shíjiān) a period of time

分 fèn spoken form of fractions and percentages; minutes; various units of measure 三分之一 (sān fēn zhī yī) one-third

处 chù places, occurrences or activities in different places; items of damage (spot, point) 两处错误 (liǎng chù cuòwù) two mistakes

片 piàn slices, tablets, tracts of land, areas of water; CDs, movies, DVDs; scenes, feelings, atmospheres, etc. 一片土地 (yī piàn tǔdì) a stretch of land

套 tào books, furniture, rooms, methods, remarks (a set, suit or suite) 一套书 (yī tào shū) a set of books

座 zuò mountains, buildings and other immovable objects 一座山 (yī zuò shān) a mountain

部 bù works of literature, films, machines, etc. 一部电影 (yī bù diànyǐng) a film

则 zé written items 一则广告 (yī zé guǎnggào) an advertisement

层 céng layers, stratums (a storey, a floor) 一层灰尘 (yī céng huīchén) a layer of dust

样 yàng kind, type 两样点心 (liǎng yàng diǎnxīn) two types of pastries

群 qún people or animals (a group, herd, flock or pack) 一群人 (yī qún rén) a crowd of people

届 jiè events, meetings, elections, sporting fixtures, years (of graduation) 一届论坛 (yī jiè lùntán) a forum (for discussion)

支 zhī long, thin, inflexible objects (pens, guns); rods; army divisions; songs or compositions 一支笔 (yī zhī bǐ) a pen

批 pī batches, lots, groups 一批学生 (yī pī xuéshēng) a group of students

篇 piān paper, book leaves, written items, articles, etc. (sheet, leaf, piece) 一篇文章 (yī piān wénzhāng) an article

番 fān actions, deeds; occurances (of an event, action or speech utterance); situations (kind, sort) 一番功夫 (yī fān gōngfū) a lot of effort

股 gǔ smells, smoke, etc. (puff, whiff); sudden, forceful actions; long winding things (ropes, rivers); bands of people 一股香味 (yī gǔ xiāngwèi) a whiff of fragrance

首 shǒu songs and poems 一首歌 (yī shǒu gē) a song

声 shēng sounds 一声炮响 (yī shēng pào xiǎng) the sound of a canon

颗 kē roundish objects (small spheres, pearls, corn grains, teeth, hearts, satellites, etc.) 一颗星星 (yī kē xīngxīng

膝盖

Xīgài  KNEE

Flicking through the channels, getting KFC

 Looking better skating to the beach....

https://youtu.be/lrROABXAn8Q?si=cJcp5-2pRygWIz4l

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Israeli Australian affairs, Benji discusses

Australian media go warm and fuzzy at the prison release of one of their favorite most cuddly industrial scale drug dealers. Next time bring presents guys and a gift card. So warm and loving 💞....

https://youtube.com/shorts/P2h0yN2GW88?si=gt4iAhytYbNaXSmt

Speaking of Dipshits at Work... 

https://youtu.be/EeeBH294v6I?si=BnmzDM0DNIpKajBH

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Benjigration and Benji-ocracy..... Are you a dignitary from Israel visiting Australia in the coming week? Print out this form I've completed for you and show where necessary

 

Visiting Israeli dignitary paperwork for Australian authorities:

Mark a 'x' (cross whether yes or no):      Yes.    No

1) are you a dipshit or a dumb dipshit               x

2) do you identify as non-binary.                         x

3) are you a member of Hezbollah except

     when spying and infiltrating.                           x

4) did you run around Lebanon and Syria 

      and Iraq and Egypt gunning Christians 

      Arabs down with all the other moslem

      Arabs there?                                                        x

5) do you hate anyone called Jesus in the 

     Spanish speaking world or elsewhere on 

     planet Earth?                                                         x

6) do you identify as a lesbian dogooder 

     or as scum of the earth?                                      x

7) is the capital of East Timor.                                  x

All killer no filler....

https://youtube.com/shorts/zIzfUGnSNsI?si=A5z3bzT1H8If00EF

Vocabulaire francais....

 

mis en examen... Indicted 

Lame.... Blade

percée .... Breakthrough 

le cas .... The case 

Holly would! Holly Candy watch with Herr Benji

 

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Red Herring, Sydney Harbour to Pittwater harbour

 

Jane's addiction, ocean size....

https://youtu.be/lVIev94s7Mo?si=2O7EBjAygzPC3-Uy

Bring 15 litres gas

Bring suncream

Bring blue sailing bag, wear shoes, carry slippers in bag

Consider bringing Outer Mark icebox with ice or Esky flagon and water separately 

LOG ON.... Marine rescue, request safety check 

AVOID long reef, one kilometre (1/2 nautical mile) space

BRING straw hat

Retrieve Howard's hat from Red Herring 

Bring packed lunch 

Check tide level at Pittwater harbour for arrival 

Bring sailing club key

RETURN marina loan key

Return Jerry can to ute

Bring opal card

Have both sails up, easterly breezes 10 knots

Comedy character R&D Dimitur talking about Chris Minns

 Training drills can be an important part of rehearsals and performances...

https://youtu.be/-Ns2FkZNTC0?si=J9_18G-IYagbmlAU

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Two months or so later, Rebecca Gibney is hosting Australia's "who wants to be a millionaire"?

 https://benjamin-english-the-ossie-spaniard.blogspot.com/2025/11/australian-actress-rebecca-gibney.html

Post from late last November.

That's a better gig than the ex-con characters in that Australian movie we just reviewed yesterday. As questionable and low career standard as those Australian lady characters were from yesterday's movie, the timing was great as it was the kids first day back at school after 6 or 7 weeks of school holidays.

The second day back for the kids today, in years 8, 6 (school captain) and 4 respectively... So they must be settling in. I flew off to the comedy club this evening after a few weeks away, to continue my training.

Let's revisit Benji's training thus far. 

Step 1) go to an acting school and request one class at $100 for one hour. Take a one hour class with a young man, Dane.

Dane says he did a stand up circuit in Canada around like Vancouver, didn't get paid what he was promised and found work in Los Angeles as a grip on film sets including a movie with Lucy Liu. It's not that hard to believe, I remember walking around LA one time when an Adam Sandler movie was shooting, I don't think I've seen it yet but I think it was the one after Switch or whichever one he has the remote controller in. Some film crew guys told me which movie it was and I just kept walking, proceeding to source a muse figure for the future coveted Benji award or whatever I was up to that day in Hollywood.

Dane's story about his wedding was odd but young people did do a lot of stupid shit so also seemed possible/plausible. Dane was an actor so he'd have to memorize lines and get in front of a big audience. I mentioned fear of audience major problem for me at the time and he said it could happen to him and he once forgot his lines. His advice: just go to the comedy club and watch for now. Then see how I go. Last thing he said, he believed in me.

2) I start going to the comedy club. It's low priority for me so I'm not rushing over there all the time. I might go to a church lunch or join some folks for a yacht race or Thursday I'm challenging myself to sail my own yacht Red Herring back to pittwater harbor from Sydney harbor, sharks or no sharks. At one point I'm literally taking notes at a small table nearest the stage. One chap gets up and asks if I'm taking notes and I gave him two thumbs up. I mean at the time, in my inner life I was going through like 20 gallon drums of anxiety by the truck load like pei mei just gave me brain damage making it 100 times harder to deal with. Anyway I noticed the comics at Newcastle were going for it bc and I my was still at a loss, how to break my cherry.

3) pivot to Newtown. One girl gets on stage and tells everyone she's a lesbian. Like so many me me me, I, I, me me younger generation morbid self obsession it fell flat for me. But there she was anyway on stage with her gumption and lack of fear. She asked the audience if anyone liked playing sim games. I put my hand up and said I do. I should mention also this stand up set was preceded by a free class given by some kind of dipshit guy which I attended as part of my training. "What did you like about playing sim games?" Well I liked building cities from scratch I told her. I think eventually she felt blocked and just walked out.

4) return to Newcastle comedy club. Who wants to volunteer? I put my hand up, I had to approach the stage and face my fears. My friend, a guitarist who has performed on stage a lot, told me to bring some sunglasses for the stage lights which I did. The lights at Newcastle comedy club are so bright and it completely distorts your visuals of the audience who you can barely see. Someone from the audience even commented on me wearing sunglasses. Anyway I never froze up. And I had gotten on stage, albeit as a volunteer.

5) get on stage once and for all. Near Central station I found somewhere that felt comfortable. Listen to everyone's bawdy jokes. I never realized at first I'd want to be in character so just presented as my baseline personality however I wasn't able to write and memorize a clinical kind of set like I saw a lot of comics doing so I just focused on riffing and feeling comfortable. I should mention at Newtown I did talk to one comic off stage and she mentioned doing a lot of community theatre and acting. I did try out for one community theatre roll David Williamson play however I never got it and the players were all Northern Beaches Sydney pseudo Brits so I looked like a fag or something to them because I didn't sound like a British little bitch. Whatever. This one lady comic at Newtown, not the self described lesbian lady, was doing incredibly self deprecating shit. Really messed up talking about dating etc as she obviously was unrealistic about dating. Kidding herself.

6) continuing my regular baseline personality at comedy club a few times, one time mocking some Chinese lady's accent. Finally some Russian guy comes in with a thick heavy accent and it must have impressed me as I tried a different venue.

7) play my Dimitur character on stage in glebe. This is where I'm at. Twenty years after academy award winning actor Nick Nolte's fiancee or wife/baby momma to be or baby momma whatever, after her dumb bitch British mom calls me a fag, yeah fuck all you British little bitches, fuck you. 23 or 24 years after taking a couple of acting lessons in Paris with Angelina Jolie and Christopher Walken's acting teacher, and many other acting lessons with other folks. This is where I'm at creatively. Tonight I felt more awareness of audience individualities and doing crowd work etc. I'm feeling more and more relaxed on stage. I'm not in any hurries. I'm not sure what this is leading to but it's important to have an extra hobby.

8) I forgot to mention, I did a podcast around the time of my second or third set on stage. At the podcast I met a couple that runs a theatre school in Newtown that sounded like I could study with them and bring it up a level. I might look into that later.

Shirley, Pam and Cash, the next episode

 

Cue the theme music....

https://youtu.be/dEjXPY9jOx8?si=N-zi3kuFcs-z9B6E

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Best of Shirley.. 

https://youtu.be/I7rCNiiNPxA?si=T7M1tmaUGBaLf9SY

Shirley, Pam and Cash; pre production notes

 

Shirley generates AI American presidents with ICE warnings for non Americans:

George W, fugg off yer terrorists fuggen shluts 

Jimmy Carter, fugg off yer peanut farming fuggen shluts 

Barrack Obama, you didn't build that you fuggen shluts 

Bill Clinton, where are all the fuggen shluts Hillary?

Shirley develops a laminated map flier with a fugg off yer fuggen shluts message and snakes and ladders game for long trips back through the desert back south from the US Mexican border for ICE.

Shirley shoots a schmaltzy friendship scene with Pam but the director cuts and complains Shirley is getting too handsy with Pam's butt

Movie review: Here I Am (2011)

 

Here I Am (2011) - IMDb https://share.google/Bdl3ofAqdf5dLyBvq

 

Australian woman gets out of gaol around Adelaide. After a heterosexual fling with a stranger on her first night out, she makes her way to a halfway house for women on parole and running from dangerous boyfriends. 

The main character, aforementioned, Karen, brings the quintessential female Australian energy to the screen. Not dikey, or obnoxious, kind of like a big female energy hit for the first day back at school after the summer holidays.

Her mom discovers her after her first night out fling and bitch slaps her in the face. Before her aforementioned relocation to the halfway house. Karen's mother refers to her as a druggo and a slut. 

Karen hasn't lost her temper until she sees her halfway house buddy in the back of a police car. She has a little meltdown then there's more great female Australian energy in the halfway house without going all Matildas gay or fashionably gay like these new Australian commercial TV shows where the naked white women start kissing each other.

It's unclear who funds this movie but probably not the Matildas or channels 7, 9 or 10.

We learn more about why the women in the halfway house are somewhat useless to society. They are somewhat retarded but not in a clinically recognized way. 

Somehow they leave the halfway house. I actually stayed at a coed halfway house for a few weeks in early 2003 just before the Americans invaded Iraq. There was one guy there, Adam, who said he'd grown up in mental hospitals since an early age, like in a padded cell a lot. It was certainly an interesting few weeks in that halfway house for me and somewhere I'd describe psychologically as still youthful, loose and carefree. I didn't get laid though so not very interesting on that level.

The main character meets a 'bloke' she likes at a backyard BBQ and gets laid. Young people like to get laid. 

Next they're back at the halfway house having a flophouse Australian women's meeting for fuckups like me and Adam at aforementioned boarding house.

Actually in those boarding house days in early 2003, I hooked up with a single mom from my hometown like a half hour or so in away. This single mom was also a total dropkick. I mentioned recently on the blog talking in Chinese to a lady from Jilin province China that couldn't speak English. That was around 9 months after the flophouse and George invasion of Iraq. This single mom had a daughter like four years old she'd just foist on her mom, same as Karen in this movie and her mom. I mean my hometown is full of multigenerational single moms so she was one of the few I hooked up with just kissing and maybe second base or first no big deal. Like one time. She was a total loser whatever.

Let's watch George announcing his big invasion from those heady days....

https://youtu.be/5BwxI_l84dc?si=VNe1kOesye_TcLG2