standby for a pigeon Chinese English review of column by ny times opinion columnist David Brooks

http://mobile.nytimes.com/2016/01/29/opinion/what-republicans-should-say.html

after various hours of cogitation: Here is Benji's pigeon Chinese English response to Mr. BROOK'S article:

why you let office cleaner write article?

that is all, sirrah!!!

nothin' wrong with that!

...

can't see anything wrong with this guy bullfighting with his daughter, he's a pro anyway..... seems a lot more wrong for this journalist to ask Margaret thatcher to jump, watch:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QiMs165tVdw

movie review: knight rider, 2016, in production

well it is officially Australia Day since ten minutes ago, although that's with summertime daylight savings, so happy Australia Day to you.


once Knight Rider hits the big screen there'll be a review right here!!


watch the trailer.... It's really exciting stuff


http://youtu.be/iQwlrEdka6Q


ok so that trailer may be misrepresentative, but apparently there's interest to make this movie according to imdb.com.... http://m.imdb.com/title/tt0384254/
I'd most definitely go see it at the cinema and haven't been since seeing Fury or something like that like over a year ago.

movie review: ted 2, mark Wahlberg.

ted gets married in the incestuous and pitiful world of entertainment 'talent' in LA (mostly uber drivers and failed prostitutes). The screenwriter was the kid that spent junior high school smoking pot and sitting in time out due to potty mouth and weakness at algebra. Ted and his sheila decide to mate after a checkout lady points out white nigger parents that are happy with their baby. Ted is probably Australian as he considers his best male friend (Wahlberg) to be his best mate. However Ted doesn't ask Wahlberg for a sperm donation when he needs a sperm donor to impregnate his wife, presumably because he's a teddy bear and doesn't have testicles. Ted's preferred donor Flash Gordon only has one sperm due to low sperm count and he doesn't want to share it. This might indicate the writers spent high school smoking pot and were only able to graduate high school due to the 'no child left behind' education policy. Next Ted and Wahlberg will try to jack off a good looking guy (it wasn't me), in his sleep but he wakes up, thwarting that reproductive avenue.


Then Ted decides Walberg's sperm is okay since he can't get Flash Gordon's nor Tom Brady's sperm. Ted finds the non sperm donor's restroom where people don't jack off, to relieve himself. Then Wahlberg discovers black people have white sperm too.


Ted's wife has a drug damaged womb or fallopian tubes or something so she can't gestate no matter what. Next option is adoption: Problem. Ted, like Mexican day laborers is considered property (persona non persona, that's Latin which is an old Italian language spoken by Romans. The Romans practically conquered all of Europe but then they met their eventual twilight and extinction).


Anyway, the movie achieves a comedic high showing Wahlberg so stoned he needs to cling to a wall like my daughter who isn't even one and can't walk yet. Generally the script is geared at people of low intelligence, think Brian Kilmeade (pronounced kill-mead) from Fox and Friends. So if you're of higher than average intelligence and not from the soviet union you might not be laughing. I'm actually remembering my father telling me: 'i don't see you laughing.' I hope he's laughing in the afterlife, I'm sure he is. He had a law degree from Spain by the way. Now a courtroom scene ensues.


There's a funny Stephen Tyler joke then Ted becomes disgusted with the judge and proceedings and busts out his iPhone to play some kids game. I would have flown the writers to Thailand to party with some Israelis and get some inspiration. Sorry if I seem unkind, I'm not a terrorist, I don't want to behead McFarlane like some NY times journalist 'working' in Syria. I've been experiencing tremendous back pain lately and I'm just not sympathetic McFarlane. Maybe I'll have to unthrow myself from under the bus. Driving a bus is just raping my back and neck. Sometimes I just enjoy suffering a little because it makes life more poignant. Why don't people pronounce the g in poignant as a hard g as in pig? Brooklyn sounding girls like Ted's wife, why should she have to pronounce poignant like a French word like the g is really a y?


Anyway benji is annoyed but not necessarily suffering watching Ted 2. The cowboy movie from McFarlane was a lot better. Also team America from the south park people was better. Anyway if McFarlane and co wants to make the occasional shit movie, that's no reason for first cousins that are also husband and wife to put their baby child aside and gun down their work buddies because they don't like Christmas. The movie plods on, clinging tenaciously to life like the dying guy in reservoir dogs (do you think Tim Roth and Tarantino have had sex?).


Yawn, Ted shoots his nose off. TED's lawyer sings a charming song, suddenly every second word isn't the f bomb, Wahlberg must have been feeling confused at that point, that was his motivation? Ho bag stops singing, violins continue, they're trying to put Wahlberg to sleep so he won't ask them for drugs and to remind him what his character's name is.


Morgan Freeman manifestations occur, the entire white race isn't lining up like the soviet union for bread to suck his dick so obviously the academy is racist and should be boycotted. Then Ted finds out he is Mexican and can't vote or get social security. He has a dependency entitlement and wants a free lunch but hasn't been listening to Mitt Romney and starting his own business.


Some poignant oboe music ensues. Oboes are beautiful woodwind instruments. The ninja turtle Raphael lobs up, but not literally with a tennis racket. That's my son's middle name: RAPHAEL.


This movie is a massive turd, think Stan's sister from south park. The only reason not to shut it down now was Walberg's cell phone had a knight rider theme song ringtone so I'm hoping there's a Hail Mary moment and Kit from knight rider lobs up (not literally with a tennis racket, not that Kit had arms to swing a racket with. God I hate this movie). Fuck you Claire McFarlane, this is the biggest piece of shit you've ever come with and to think I thought you were like Jesus. SCOTT Fitzgerald you! This movie just makes LA people look stupid, it's an insult to them.


Smoke up Johnny!!!!
http://youtu.be/jsZkkqLDFmg


homework assignment: Write a 5000 dissertation (or deposition in the event you're currently incarcerated) on the following scenario...


you are kidnapped by the arse and mouth raping (with dildos) grey aliens from south park. They are doing all kinds of crazy reproduction experiments. You discover you can control them by making them sniff glue. You use your new authority and their superior technology to kidnap G.I. Jane from the G.I. Jane movie and Johnny Bender from the breakfast club in order to mate the two and breed their offspring. Consider how during a four to eight year presidency, Donald Trump might create Lebensraum for your new kids. Also, what are the advantages and disadvantages, generally, of sniffing glue over White-Out from a plastic bag.


Pd, there's some new rocket man movie coming out in February, total gay agenda. See you in hell rocket man people.

HOW is it the Europeans can come up with funny laws like the 'right to be forgotten' but can't field an army to control the situation in syria?

http://news.yahoo.com/end-europe-berlin-brussels-shock-tactic-migrants-104113981--business.html


500 million people, approximately 24% of the entire world's economy.......... these Europeans can come up with every bitch arse thing you can imagine:  chronic pot smoking, incredibly cheap alcohol and unaffordable groceries.........shitty wages...........where does all their 24% of the global economy go to?

most Europeans don't have a pot to piss in...... amazingly, approximately a quarter of every American dollar taxed goes straight to the military...... no wonder they have such a mighty army..... they also have two nice big oceans to protect themselves plus a department of homeland security and a population willing to be crotch checked daily at airports all over the place in case they've stuck nitroglycerin up their arses, even grannies and little kids..............they also have a city-sized national security computer apparatus all over the place, automatically checking through emails and phone calls..............

Europe thought they were so smug, saving all that money on military expenditure and lording it over everyone, lecturing them on the importance of google deleting information of EU citizens that want to be 'forgotten'.............. well not anymore............with an easy land border wide open through disgruntled Greeks that Germany was driving into the ground for years.......things just got ugly....Europe has plenty enough military to put their own army on the ground in Syria, but for some reason they seem adverse to war.........call it a cultural thing........... it wasn't like they didn't get plenty of it during world wars one and two, these brits and frenchies and germans..............now, all of a sudden, they are gun-shy................

well, they'd better change their attitude because there's plenty more migrants, economic and otherwise, ready to flood their countries.............. very difficult to understand their left-wing politics these Europeans, so averse to flexing some military muscle.......

Cameron said it pretty clearly didn't he? fix the problem in Syria with an army............ well it's up to the germans to step up to the plate............. can't understand these germans for the life of me!